Attack Attack This Band
Pioneers in Crabcore
So it was a late Sunday night and I just finished off a bottle of Jose with a good friend. We were watching some old NIN videos and exploring the internets for other music videos from times once past. Amidst our joy of Reznors’ bygone years of video anguish, that’s when it happened; we stumbled across Attack Attack!’s “Stick Stickly” music video.
I know there is some bad music out there but this really takes the rude-boy-emo-lame-fuck-douche award of the year.
Where to start? How about at the beginning. Within 10 seconds of the start of the video you see these fucks bouncing around. I am going to venture out on a limb and say they are…headbanging while trying to shit? I dunno. This video has it all though. Dancing, techno beats, stupid hair cuts, synchronized hair throws, and what kind of stupid scenecore video would be complete without some meaningless hot chick.
An incorrect power stance (crabcore stance) will result in loss of vision, creativity, and produce shitstained undies.
The presence of auto tuned vocals also doesn’t help them either. Who’s bright idea was it that signed these guys? Please…shoot yourself in the face.
Also, just to clarify how exactly not metal these fucks are. See figures A, B, or C, on proper metal (power) stance. Note the abscense of any sort of “Crab” position in all three. These are the proper metal power stances defined by Thor and or Zeus themselves. The inventors of heavy fucking metal.
Holy jesus, what the fuck is this shit? I’ve heard/seen some bad shit, but this takes the cake, and the fucking dance shit in the end, what the fuck.
holy fuck the autotune is out of control. let’s start a band like this, fart out some songs that consist of nothing of breakdowns and power chord choruses, autotune everything, and get rich as fuck.
Yeh. Pretty much in the top 10 for shitty bands that will make you fart out of your ears.
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